Mammogram

[Grizzlygirl]

This is a cute way to send "the message"!
There is a serious message at the end, but you get to laugh on the way
there.
Now go out and have your mammies grammed!

For years and years they told me,
Be careful of your breasts.
Don't ever squeeze or bruise them.
And give them monthly tests.

So I heeded all their warnings,
And protected them by law.
Guarded them very carefully,
And I always wore my bra.

After 30 years of astute care,
My gyno, Dr. Pruitt,
Said I should get a Mammogram
"O.K," I said, "let's do it."

"Stand up here real close" she said,
(She got my boob in line),
"And tell me when it hurts," she said,
"Ah yes! Right there, that's fine."

She stepped upon a pedal,!
I could not believe my eyes!
A plastic plate came slamming down,
My hooter's in a vise!

My skin was stretched and mangled,
From underneath my chin.
My poor boob was being squashed,
To Swedish Pancake thin.

Excruciating pain I felt,
Within it's vise-like grip.
A prisoner in this vicious thing,
My poor defenseless tit!

"Take a deep breath" she said to me,
Who does she think she's kidding?!?
My chest is mashed in her machine,
And woozy I am getting.

"There, that's good," I heard her say,
(The room was slowly swaying.)
"Now, let's have a go at the other one."
Have mercy, I was praying.

It squeezed me from both up and down,
It squeezed me from both sides.
I'll bet SHE'S never had this done,
To HER tender little hide.

Next time that they make me do this,
I will request a blindfold.
I have no wish to see again,
My knockers getting steam rolled.

If I had no problem when I came in,
I surely have one now.
If there had been a cyst in there,
It would have gone "ker-pow!"

This machine was created by a man,
Of this, I have no doubt.
I'd like to stick his balls in there,
And see how THEY come out!

BreastCancer Awareness...
Go have those boobs checked out and stay healthy! Pass the message on to your mothers, sisters, daughters, aunts, cousins, friends --
and even your enemies -- because the WORST enemy is Breast Cancer!
>>
>>Share this fun mammogram reminder with ALL the women you know!
   IT'S REALLY NOT THAT BAD ANYMORE....SO MAKE SURE YOU GET ONE,
    Mama Grizz

[qt314nfla]

MammaGrizz that's some funny stuff.  I'm thankful for the Monday morning laugh. 

Any news on the first aid class? I think we could get ppl interrested on one of these group rides.  Who knows.  The next 3 day weekend we know where most of us are going and there's not enough time to plan it.  Any suggestions. 

[Grizzlygirl]

Called council about getting the dolls for Oct 1 weekend, They haven't gotten back to me yet. Was thinking of running a class on Sun. Oct 2 will let you know.

   Mama Grizz

[qt314nfla]

Thanks.  Let me know what I can do to help.

[Kat1333]

Mama Grizz you are too funny.      A man definitely designed those machines.  You are so right, they are very important to have done.
I would be very interested in the Florida First Aid course.  I hope to attend the ride you all are planning for Oct 1st.
Not that this will help any, I used to be a certified CPR,  Advanced Life Support (EMS) and First Aid Instructor in Illinois.  Now I am just certifiable. LOL  Let me know, as I would love to participate and get certified in Florida.  It is always great to know.
Kat a/k/a quadless

[Grizzlygirl]

Ok I got the CPR and First Aid Program for the weekend who is interested in taking the class on Sunday and becoming American Red Cross Certified price $ 20 each. I need at least 12 students. It will be held at Elite Campgrounds on the Sunday following the ride on Saturday
Mama Grizz   

[qt314nfla]

I posted on another thread but I'm definately in.   Thanks again mamma grizz.  See you in a couple of weeks.  Through hell or high water I'm going to meet you this time.  I've missed you too many times before.