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Pages: [1] 2 3 4 5 6 ... 8
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General / Open Discussion / Re: ATV BOOM BOX
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on: July 30, 2006, 04:01:08 PM
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Your better off making your own. You can check the highlifter web site and I think you'll fiind something but it's like 500-600 dollars for the full set.
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2
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General / Open Discussion / Re: Deltona place near the power lines
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on: March 15, 2006, 10:03:29 AM
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I have not written my letter yet, but I plan to do that next week or even Friday,,,,,I have a business trip over to Tampa on Friday and I will not be driving so I'll take the tablet with me and write out a letter then.
Id@
Hey Ida, did you ever get a chance to write that letter and send it in? Just wondering what's the status.
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3
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General / Open Discussion / Guess who is working at Wal-Mart ?
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on: March 10, 2006, 03:00:14 PM
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An office manager at Wal-Mart was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.
The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table the interviewer asked, "What is the fastest thing you know of?" Acknowledging the first man on his right, the man replied, "A THOUGHT." It just pops into your head. There's no warning that it's on the way; it's just there. A thought is the fastest thing I know of."
"That's very good!" replied the interviewer. "And now you sir?" he asked the second man. "Hmm.! ... let me see. A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of." "Excellent!" said the interviewer. "The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliché for speed."
He then turned to the third man who was contemplating his reply. "Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light in the barn comes on in less than an instant. Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of." The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. "It's hard to beat the speed of light," he said.
Turning to Bubba, the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the same question. Old Bubba replied, "After hearing the three previous answers, It's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA."
"WHAT!?" said the interviewer, stunned by the response. "Oh I can explain." said Old Bubba. "You see the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but, before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already sh*t in my pants."
Old Bubba is now the new greeter at a Wal-Mart near you!!!!
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5
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General / Open Discussion / Venezuela Dictator Vows To Bring Down U.S. Government
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on: March 09, 2006, 01:13:46 PM
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Venezuela Dictator Vows To Bring Down U.S. Government Venezuela government is sole owner of Citgo gasoline company Venezuela Dictator Hugo Chavez has vowed to bring down the U.S. government. Chavez, president of Venezuela, told a TV audience: "Enough of imperialist aggression; we must tell the world: down with the U.S. empire. We have to bury imperialism this century." The guest on ! his television program, beamed across Venezuela, was Cindy Sheehan, the antiwar activist. Chavez recently had as his guest Harry Belafonte, who called Presiden t Bush "the greatest terrorist in the world." Chavez is pushing a socialist revolution and has a close alliance with Cuban dictator Fidel Castro. Regardless of your feelings about the war in Iraq, the issue here is that we have a socialist dictator vowing to bring down the government of the U.S . And he is using our money to achieve his goal! The Venezuelagovernment, run by dictator Chavez, is the sole owner of Citgo gas company. Sales of products at Citgo stations send money back to Chavez to help him in his vow to bring down our government. Take Action Please decide t hat you will not be shopping at a Citgo station. Why should U.S. citizens who love freedom be financing a dictator who ! has vowed to take down our government? Very important. Please forward this to your friends and family. Most of them don't know that Citgo is owned by the Venezuela government. See below for info copied from Citgo’s web site. About CITGO From the gasoline that helps your family take vacations to the advanced medical equipment at your community hospital, CITGO is there. We know you. It's amazing the difference petroleum-based products make in our everyday lives. Based in Houston, Texas, CITGO is a refiner and marketer of transportation fuels, lubricants, petrochemicals, refined waxes, asphalt and other industrial products. In addition to these products, there's probably a CITGO in your neighborhood, a convenient place to fill up with gas and grab a quick snack. The company is owned by PDV Amer! ica, Inc., an indirect, wholly owned subsidiary of Petróleos de Venezuela, S.A., the national oil company of the Bolivarian Republic of Venezuela. Since 1985, CITGO has sold its various products through independent marketers. Our relationship with these people is really what makes CITGO different from other petroleum companies. Welcome to CITGO.
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10
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General / Open Discussion / Witness
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on: March 03, 2006, 02:09:11 PM
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A Southern small-town prosecutor called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?" She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and
frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, cheat on your wife, manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you." The lawyer was stunned.
Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too.
He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him." The defense attorney almost died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you bast--ds asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry a$$es in jail for contempt."
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13
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General / Open Discussion / A Man of Few Words
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on: March 03, 2006, 11:29:07 AM
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For as long as there are bad people in the world, we will need to continue training Marines like this. A 'touchy-feelie' CNN reporter, maybe one of those "girlie men", while interviewing a Marine sniper, asked, "What do you feel when you shoot a terrorist." The Marine shrugged and replied, "Recoil."
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14
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General / Open Discussion / Tetanus Shot
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on: March 03, 2006, 11:19:10 AM
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The old man in his mid-eighties struggles to get up from the couch and then starts putting on his coat. His wife, seeing the unexpected behavior,asks, "Where are you going?" He replies, "I'm going to the doctor." She says, "Why, are you sick?" He says, "Nope, I'm going to get me some of that Viagra stuff." Immediately the wife starts working and positioning herself to get out of her rocker and begins to put on her coat. He says, "Where the hell are you going"? She answers, "I'm going to the doctor, too." He says, "Why, what do you need?" She says, "If you're going to start using that rusty old thing, I'm getting a tetanus shot."
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15
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General / Open Discussion / The Yearly Physical
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on: March 03, 2006, 11:15:16 AM
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I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. The nurse starts with certain basics.
How much do you weigh?" she asks.
"115," I say.
The nurse puts me on the scale. It turns out my weight is 140.
The nurse asks, "Your height?"
"5 foot 6," I say.
The nurse checks and sees that I only measure 5'1".
She then takes my blood pressure and tells me it is very high.
"Of course it's high!" I scream, "When I came in here I was tall and slender! Now I'm short and fat!"
She put me on Prozac.
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General / Photo Gallery & Videos / Re: Your Gas Dollar at Waste
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on: March 03, 2006, 10:25:28 AM
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Why is gasoline $2.39 a gallon for regular unleaded? ?? Supply and demand??? That must be it.... we want them to supply us with the oil and they demand that we pay the price so they can ski in the desert! [attachment deleted by admin]
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General / Photo Gallery & Videos / Re: Your Gas Dollar at Waste
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on: March 03, 2006, 10:24:11 AM
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Remember, this is in the middle of the desert....
The very HOT desert where temperatures get up to 120 degrees.....
Unbelievable!
But true.....
The INSIDE view:
[attachment deleted by admin]
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