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Those Northern Rednecks
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Topic: Those Northern Rednecks (Read 2302 times)
WickedBanshee
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git r dun
Those Northern Rednecks
«
on:
March 03, 2007, 08:32:47 PM »
ABSOLUTELY A TRUE STORY HEARD ON A WISCONSIN RADIO STATION REPORTING ON THE INCIDENT.
A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 (with monthly payments of $560.00.) He and a friend go duck hunting in Northern Wisconsin. It's mid-winter; and of course all of the lakes are frozen.
These two guys go out on the ice with their GUNS, a DOG, and of course the new NAVIGATOR.
They decide they want to make a natural looking open water area for the ducks to focus on, something for the decoys to float on.
Now making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a passing duck is going to take a little more power than the average drill auger can produce.
So, out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of dynamite with a short 40 second-fuse.
Now our two Rocket Scientists, afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to run away after lighting the fuse (and becoming toast, along with the Navigator), decide on the following course of action:
They light the 40 second fuse; then, with a mighty thrust, they throw the stick of dynamite as far away as possible.
Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the NAVIGATOR, the GUNS, and the DOG....
Let's talk about the dog: A highly trained Black Lab used for RETRIEVING; especially things thrown by the owner.
You guessed it: the dog takes off across the snow-covered ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the stick of dynamite, with the burning 40-second fuse, just as it hits the ice.
The two men swallow, blink, start waving their arms and, with veins in their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and holler at the dog to stop. The dog, now apparently cheered on by his master, keeps coming.
One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots at the dog. The shotgun is loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop a Black Lab.
The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, then continues on.
Another shot, and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really confused and of course terrified, thinks these two geniuses have gone insane.. The dog takes off to find cover, UNDER the brand new Navigator.
The men continue to scream as they run. The red hot exhaust pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end, he yelps, drops the dynamite under the truck and takes off after his master.
Then " "" "" "" "" " BOOOOOOOOOOOOM "" "" "" "" "" ! ! !
The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the lake, leaving the two idiots standing there with "I can't believe this just happened" looks on their faces.
The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake by illegal use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy.
And he still had yet to make the first of those $560.00 a month payments.
The dog is okay. . .doing fine.
And you thought Rednecks only lived in the South...
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FoxHondaRider
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Re: Those Northern Rednecks
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Reply #1 on:
March 04, 2007, 09:33:54 AM »
Hahaha that is hilarious! What idiots bringing the new truck out there.
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eldiablo64
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Re: Those Northern Rednecks
«
Reply #2 on:
March 04, 2007, 10:38:01 AM »
hahaha I think takin the truck woulda been ok if the idiots didn't take dynamite to go huntin!!
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backwoods boy
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Re: Those Northern Rednecks
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Reply #3 on:
March 07, 2007, 04:02:34 PM »
ya tht would kinda scare the ducks off
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NObama08 '' nigga please its the WHITE house''
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yunt2ride
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Re: Those Northern Rednecks
«
Reply #4 on:
March 14, 2007, 03:30:49 PM »
Its false. read snopes
http://www.snopes.com/critters/cruelty/dynamite.asp
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dynodon
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Re: Those Northern Rednecks
«
Reply #5 on:
March 14, 2007, 06:21:44 PM »
Quote from: FoxHondaRider on March 04, 2007, 09:33:54 AM
Hahaha that is hilarious! What idiots bringing the new truck out there.
You OBVIOUSLY have NEVER lived in the north during the winter months !!!!!
Its NOT uncommon to see several NEW trucks, snowmobiles, and yes, Fishing shanties. Hence the term " shanty town".
Visit Houghton lake Michigan, ohh about mid december, and tell me if there are less than 40-50 trucks out there.
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